Jackie's Journey "I Am Not a Fan!"

In the story of “Princess Grace and the Little Lost Kitten”, we see her faith tested in ways that resonate deeply with us as mothers.  Opening “my box “ to share from my own journey of faith, reminded me of the life-lesson from Grace’s story.

 As a former tribal missionary, I faced many challenging seasons in my life.  As a mother of two young princesses, balancing “off the grid” survival skills, home-schooling, linguistics, language learning (Kuna), evangelism, running the small medical clinic, delivering babies, washing clothes in the river and cooking food I had never seen before, etc….I found myself overwhelmed!  

Oh, and then…there is the matter of the creeping, crawling reptiles…

 I have never been a fan of reptiles…

 Panama is the home to some of the most frightening snakes on the planet.  Our corner of the dense Darien jungle was full of boa constrictors, pit vipers, fer-de-lance (this snake bears 60 live babies at a time!), etc.  We were cautious not to poke under rocks or fallen branches, always scanning for any slithering menaces.  Behind our house there was a massive tree that extended its immense roots out into the river shoreline where the girls and I bathed and swam.  The thick mangrove swamp harbored snakes that would lie in the hollow places of the trunk of that tree. 

 More than once I cried out Psalm 16:1

 “Keep me safe, Oh Lord, for in you I take refuge.”

 Fear is no stranger to me.  I am habitually challenged to walk through the door of fear.   I was told during missionary training that courage was not the absence of fear, but the conquest of it.

 “The highway of fear is the shortest route to defeat”.  William L. Brownell

 My husband had built a screened-in back porch to the house.  It became home for our gasoline-run wringer washing machine.  The Indians thought the machine was the most ridiculous apparatus they had ever seen!  It was noisy, the water had to be carried from the river (or in rainy season, we could utilize the convenience of the roof rain barrels).   The agitator was a mystery (why would you jerk clothes around in dirty cold water when the river is running and clear!) however; the wringer was another story…it worked really well.  Hand wrung clothes could not match that wringer!  I had to agree with them on all counts! 

While I washed, Kim would play on a blanket or crawl around the porch.  The floor was slightly elevated, lined with wooden planks roughly cut and loosely fit together.  It was not quite finished and as I leaned over the machine, I saw Kim crawling toward something moving under the floorboard.   I turned off the deafening machine, snatched Kim up into my arms and “yelled” for Ralph!  Writhing back and forth, only a few inches away, was a 5’ venomous snake! He had quite possibly been a houseguest for “who knows how long” before we noticed him! Let me repeat…

I am not a fan and I intensely dislike reptiles!

 Arturo, our nearest neighbor had heard me scream and came running, He quickly surveyed our predicament, raised his machete and removed the head of that reptile with one swift blow.  He held it up like a prized Marlin…its length was above his head and its tail draped to the muddy ground!

 This story could have had a much different ending, were it not for our Sovereign God, His plan and the life-lessons He was busy teaching me!  School is always in session if we have eyes to see it. The need to grow and mature will never end on this side of eternity. Fear has been my friend and biggest challenge.  I am to fear the consequence of sin, not snakes.  Easy concept until put to the test!

 “Be strong and of a good courage, Fear not, nor be afraid of them (in this case…snakes);

for the Lord your God, He it is that does go with me, He will not fail me nor forsake me.” 

Deuteronomy 31: 16

 “I sought the Lord and He heard me and delivered me from all my fears.”

Psalm 34:4 

 What do you do with your fear?

 This week take note of areas in your life where  you feel overwhelmed.

Like Princess Grace, walk through your fear and rest in God’s sovereignty.

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "War-Torn and Battle-Scarred!"

My daughters, Kim and Christina today

On May 14, 1989 my two, then, teen-age daughters gave me an NAS monogrammed black Bible for Mother’s Day, that I have loved and protected, as a dear friend for over almost 40 years.  It carries within its once blank pages a wealth of notes as God spoke to my heart and taught me life-long lessons.  I am a prolific note-taker and this Bible is packed with names, stars, highlighting, hearts and steps of action searing its pages. I read the Bible through each year so you can imagine what it looks like!

Four men arrived carrying a paralyzed man on a mat.  They couldn’t bring him to Jesus because of the crowd, so they opened a hole through the roof above his head.  Then they lowered the man on his mat, right down in front of Jesus. (Mark 2:3-4)   The note I have in the margin…” Who will you carry, Jackie?”  A simple reminder of a given responsibility. 

J.B. Philips (my favorite Bible that carried me through college) wrote, “The danger to professing Christians lies not in more glaring and grosser temptations and sins, but in a slow deterioration of vision, a slow death to daring courage and willingness to adventure with God.”  If I have lost sight of my responsibility…. I have a definable loss of vision…calling me into accountability.

Whether you are single woman, a mom or grandmother, we each carry responsibility for the short life we live here. Life is simple…a stewardship, not an ownership; a trust and not a gift.  With a gift you can do as you please, but with a trust…you must give an account. (Eph. 2:10)

As I slowly bend the pages of this war-torn Bible, I am reminded of the privilege we have been given to yield to HIS purpose and will in this life and how HE has given us everything we need to live a life that pleases HIM. (II Peter 1:2-3) No excuses for loss of vision or misuse of HIS gift.  His Word is the path through this maize called life.  The other choice…chaos and loss.

What is your choice?

“…every mouth will be silenced and the whole world

held accountable to God.”  Romans 3: 19 NIV

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "The Battle Field!"

Memorial Day is an annual celebration of our Patriotism.  This  is the day we set aside to unmistakably demonstrate love, appreciation, devotion and pride for one’s country and the “counting of the cost” that was paid to secure our freedom  to live here.

 “Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for us…

 Jesus Christ and The American Soldier

 One died for our eternal soul and the other for our freedom.”

Franklin Graham

Operation Heal Our Patriots

 Let’s take time, today, and stop to honor the military men who have served, been wounded or have given their very life for our freedom… Let’s show them our love, devotion and pride…

 “IF my people, which are called by my Name,

will humble themselves, and pray, THEN will I hear from heaven,

and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”

II Chronicles 7: 14

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "The Clock is Ticking"

Precious Princesses

 Are you a mother?  Do you hope to be a mom one day? There is no time to waste.  The few short formative years we have with our children calls for an imperative response.  C.S. Lewis said, ”Children are not a distraction from the more important work.  They are the most important work!” 

 After all is said and done, the legacy that matters will not be the assets we leave behind or the company that we have built, or the tidy house we leave…but what we have believed God to build into the life of our child.  Do they feel safe, seen and loved when in our presence? Do they sense the love of God in us?

 Our heritage is all that goes on after we are gone.  That should be a welcomed responsibility and priority that we embrace whole-heartedly; not a frustrating burden that is viewed through subverted thinking.  How connected to the heart of your child are you? 

 Do they think to tell Mom first when life gets sticky or do they run to their friends?  Cultivated relationships don’t just happen…they take time and nurturing.  Are you an intentional mother with your little prince and princess?  Are you intentional with yourself and your life patterns and with God in your time with him?

 We only have one shot at this “important work”…

 What would it take to make us mother’s that are violently driven toward the heart of God and His clear instruction book?  The vast majority of God’s will for our life and the life of our child has already been revealed in the Bible; not in what social media serves up or what other mothers are doing, but in mothers obsessed with a passion for God’s Word and His will for themselves and their children? 

 The clock is ticking…

 “Our greatest danger in life is in permitting the urgent things to crowd out the important.”  Charles E. Hummel

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "The Pulse of Sacrifice"

I love you, sweet Mama…“Love is not a passion.  It is the pulse of sacrifice”.

 For seventy-eight years my mother taught me about genuine love and Motherhood.  I watched her as she maneuvered life.  She had an iron will, was strong and courageous, especially in her later years without Daddy.  She faced life with grace each day accepting God’s Hand and timing.  She had no fear of old age which is the assumption that we still have many years of life ahead of us. “The length of our days is seventy years or eighty, IF we have the strength; yet this span is but trouble and sorrow and passes quickly and then we fly away! (Psalm 90:10)  My mother flew away four years ago and I miss her every day.

 She learned to be “satisfied in the morning with His unfailing love.  She did not sing for joy out loud but she was glad for every day.”  And she still looked forward to any, or all, of us coming and visiting with her.  She was a good listener and I can remember my high school friends coming home with me… to talk and be with her! 

 She was a wise, precious 101-year-old Mama.  She taught me, by example, “to number my days, to be deliberate with my heritage, to think generations and to see how short and quickly life passes.  I am still paying attention.  So, you see, Mom…your job has been well done.

 Thank you for leading the way, leaving a print for me to step into

and showing me the pulse of sacrificial love…

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "Jungle Ants!"

We love spring because it means new life….everywhere!   The snow melts, rivers fill up, flowers bloom, newborns of every kind appear round about us…including ants! Warmer weather means beach days, planting gardens, picnics and B-B Q’s. The Princess Parable Series has a seasonal book called “A Royal Easter Story”  and it takes our five princesses into the woods for a Princess Tea Picnic with all the beauty of spring and an opportunity to rescue a lost little girl…

 “A solitary ant, afield, cannot be considered to have much of anything on its mind, indeed, with only a few neurons strung together by fibers, he can’t  be imagined to have a mind at all, much less a thought.  He is more like a ganglion on legs with a lot of initiative.  Four ants together or ten, encircling a dead moth on a path, begin to look more like an idea.  They fumble and shove, gradually moving the food toward the hill, but as though by blind chance.

 It is only when you watch the dense mass of thousands of ants, crowded together around the hill, blackening the ground, that you begin to see the whole beast, and now you observe it thinking, planning, calculating.  It is an intelligence, a kind of live computer, with crawling bits for its wits!” An ant could never be thought of as idle…they never stop moving …aggressively!

While living in the Darien, my husband had no fear of snakes, scorpions, spiders …BUT … the ant…he had great respect and trepidation.  Our youngest daughter, only two, took some cookies to bed with her one night. We heard her moaning in her sleep.  A swarm of army ants had gotten under the mosquito netting and a foot  wide swarm of huge black ants had come up from under the wooden floor and they were after the cookie crumbs and attacking Kim!  Ralph, in one fell swoop, grabbed our daughter and tossed her into my arms. The next few moments were ear-shattering, as he crunched and sprayed the mass of teeming ants, re-directing their onslaught!

 When the dust settled, we realized there was a life-lesson to be learned and it was more than just NOT taking food to bed!  The thinking phase of initiative is to plan, calculate, invent and imagine. The opposite of initiative is to be idle!  We are to study the ant because God calls us to  the take initiative and be actively moving toward His mind and heart daily.  Amy Carmichael wrote, “Satan is much more earnest than we are…he buys up the opportunity while we are wondering how much it will cost us.”

Let’s be busy this week carrying out the will of God

by enthusiastically and assertively keeping in tune with

God’s heart and His leading.

 “Go to the ant,  you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise!  It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest.” Proverbs 6: 6-8

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "Darien Endurance!"

Life has a way of introducing us to the realities and expectations we have of ourselves and those that others put on us.  As parents, we tend to translate these into the lives of our children, if we are not open to instruction and correction.  When we are thrown into the floodgates of pursuits, we learn to bend, not break. We, with intentionality,  pursue excellence and put everything we have into every venture.

 One day in the Darien, the “spaghetti hit the fan” and I found myself sensing failure at everything…overwhelmed with pending defeat!  Sitting at my jungle desk with homeschool material, a linguistic box, two little princesses calling “mom” (because they needed lunch), my wash in a big basket on the front porch with the river calling, a house-full of Kuna mothers with their babies sitting in every available space in our living room (including the floor) and my heart being pulled in every direction…I finally gave in, after months of coping and burst into tears!

 I was a failure! It was hot and muggy and my head was throbbing! I was overwhelmed with it all and in that moment, in walks our partners, Jay and Sue.  Compassionately, they asked, “Why are you crying?”  My honest reply, “I am a failure as a wife, missionary, mother, language learner…why I don’t even know how to cook most of what is handed to me!  No running water, no electricity, no washing machine for three dozen diapers…” Expecting an understanding word, I was shocked to hear Jay say, “Jackie, you are a failure!”  No empathy there!

 I learned about endurance that day and how failure was my best friend because it was my reminder that I couldn’t, but He could.  Rom. 5: 3-5  He is never tired or weary and just waiting for me to surrender it all to him so He could begin to build His strength of character in me.

 Endurance is continuing to do what is right, trusting God has got the plan and  even though the difficult times overwhelm, they ultimately lead to unexpected opportunities that I would have missed if I had quit.  It is the inward strength to withstand stress and continue to trust God for whatever life might bring my way.

 Easter was this past Sunday and I am reminded again of the example He set for us in enduring the cross for me.  He is not a “quitter” and faced the horrific trek through courts, mocking, chiding, beatings, being spit upon, floggings, hanging hours on a cruel cross with ripping tendons…to complete the will of His Father …and He endured until the end…victorious!

 There is no excuse for us…HE set the bar…

Whatever our circumstance, we stick to the task with thanksgiving,

 knowing He will do it (if we get out of His way!) and

it has eternal benefit and divine purpose.

It’s a total win…win!

 “Let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.  For the joy set before Him, He endured the cross, scorning the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.”  Hebrews 12: 2-3

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "He Is Risen!"

Yesterday we gathered to celebrate resurrection glory…because He lives I can face tomorrow…because He lives all fear is gone…because I know who holds the future…life is worth the living just because He lives…

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "Unthinkable Sacrifice"

This Friday is “Good Friday”.  This day is “specifically set aside for us to meditate on all that Jesus suffered, all the pain, the shame, and the curse that characterized his death. My eyes well up with tears when I consider the unthinkable affliction Christ endured.

 Every year around this time—right before Easter—a certain plant comes alive on my patio with bright, red blossoms. It is commonly known as “Crown of Thorns.” 

I always enjoy parking my chair close to it to examine its delicate flowers, so thin, fragile, and brilliant with red color. But then, I take a moment and let my eyes linger on its huge, thick, nail-like thorns, rumored to be those used in the crown placed on my Saviors head.

The pain and humility Jesus physically suffered leading up to his death was a mere warm-up to the real dread he faced.

As he hung on the cross, he began to feel a foreign sensation. Somewhere during those hours that his body was impaled, an earthly foul odor must have wafted, not around his nose, but in his heart. He felt dirty. Human wickedness began to crawl upon his spotless being—the living excrement from our souls.

The apple of the Father’s eye began to turn brown with the rot of our sin.

I let the thought settle deep, forcing my heart to imagine the rage, the wrath of God being poured out like hot oil on the wounded heart of the Son of Man. God the Father watching as his heart’s treasure, the mirror-image of himself, sank drowning into raw, liquid sin.

There is no room for a casual sentimentality regarding the cross—as an instrument of unspeakable torture, the cross is far too gruesome for any light-hearted fondness”. Written from the heart of Joni Erikson

 After reading Joni’s article, my heart began to sing and

I took on a new, magnified, eternal gratefulness

 for all that HE did for me on the cross of Calvary… 

  How about you?

Join me today in carving out quiet time to reflect on the awful weight of Good Friday. And then, breathe a prayer of wonder and thanksgiving to our Savior

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights. 

Jackie's Journey "I Want EVERYTHING!"

"“A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art.  They had everything in their collection from Picasso to Raphael.  They would often sit together and admire the great works of art.

 When the Viet Nam conflict broke out, the son went to war.  He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier.  The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son.  About a month later there was a knock at the door.  A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands.

 He said, ‘Sir, you don’t know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life.  He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly.  He often talked  about you and your love for art.’

 The young man held out his package.  ‘I know this isn’t much.  I’m not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this’.  The father opened the package.  It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man.   He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the painting.  The father was so drawn to the eyes  that his own eyes welled  up with tears.

 He thanked the man and offered to pay him but the soldier replied, ‘I could never repay what your son did for me…it is a gift’.  The father hung the portrait over his mantle and when visitors came, he took them to see his son before he showed them any of the other great works of art he had collected.

 A few months later, the man died. There was to be a great auction of his paintings.  Many influential people gathered, hoping to purchase a famous painting for their collection.  First, on the platform, was the painting of the son.  The auctioneer pounded his gavel.  We will start the bidding with this picture of the son.  Who will bid for this picture?

 Someone in the back of the room shouted, “We want to see the famous paintings.  Skip this one.”  But the auctioneer persisted.  Will someone bid for this painting?  Who will start the biding. $100.00 - $200.00??  Another voice shouted angrily, ‘We did not come to see this painting.  We came to see the Van Goghs, the Rembrandts…”  Get on with the real bid’s’.

 But still the auctioneer continued, “The son…the son…who will take the son?”  Finally, a voice came from the very back of  the room.  It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. “I’ll give $10.00 for the painting.”  Being a poor man, it was all he could afford. ‘We have $10.00, who will bid $20.00?’

‘Let’s see the Masters!’ $10.00 dollars is bid, won’t someone bid $20.00?  The crowd was becoming angry.  They did not want the picture of the son.  They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections.  The auctioneer pounded the gavel.  “Going once, twice, SOLD for $10.00.”

 A man sitting in the second row shouted,” Great, now, let’s get on with the collection’.  The auctioneer laid down his gavel and said, ‘I’m sorry but the auction is over.’ ‘What…what about the paintings!’ ‘I am sorry.  When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will.  I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time.  Whoever bought the painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings.  The man who took the son gets everything!” ( author unknown)

 God gave His Son 2,000 years ago to die on the cruel cross.

 Much like the auctioneer, His message today is,

“The Son, the Son, who will take the Son?” 

 Because you see…whoever takes the Son gets everything!

~Jackie Johnson - I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America.  Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a Spanish-speaking church in Southern California.  My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood, and beyond. I am the mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights.