Mothering is hard work.
Mothering is harder alone.
Being a good wife takes effort.
Being a good wife without support is difficult.
Staying the course requires discipline.
Staying the course is easier with cheerleaders.
I was a tomboy growing up. I had two younger brothers; we would play tackle football on the beach, wrestle and race to wherever we could. I think it is funny that God took that tomboy and planned for her to author the Princess Parables. Maybe that is why I wanted Charity to have boots on under her skirt!
In my teen years, something changed in me and I began to want to be more “girly”. I began liking dresses, tea parties and pink. Even in those days, I always gravitated toward boys for friends because the girls always seemed to have more drama.
As a newly married woman, I saw the need to have more girl friends in my life. It was no longer appropriate to have the “boy” friends, and my husband was now my best friend. When I was a new mom, I longed for fellowship and deep connections with women, even though I saw much of the same drama as in Middle School. The Lord had changed me, and I saw that I desired friendship with those in the same life stage as me. I was blessed to be in the ministry of MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) for 8 years. God brought around me women who loved the Lord and shared similar desires to serve Him in all we did.
Finding community is so important as a mom. I am not just talking about women who have kids our kids like to play with, but real “kindred spirits”. I prayed hard for women who shared my same faith and who had a desire to change the world. I looked for women who followed God and listened for His voice. I found a community of women who cheer me on, who came to my rescue when cancer hit, and who inspire me to be the woman God wants me to be.
This did not happen overnight. There were many women who have come in and out of my life at different seasons who played a part. There are many women who I didn’t connect with and there were many who moved on into a different place in their life. But today I have a community of ladies in my Mom Heart group and in my Elements Bible Study that fill the need for community. God continues to bring women into my life for each step He has given me.
I have heard too many stories of women . . . alone, who struggle as a mom, as a wife and struggle to follow God’s call. I had struggles along the way, too, and I could not have survived without my friends. They served practical needs: brought me meals when I had babies and watched my kids when I had doctors’ appointments. They also filled in the gaps for me spiritually as they prayed with and for me. They have inspired me to be a better mom, a happier wife and to go after the callings that I have felt God has placed on my life.
If you don’t have a community of like-minded women in your life, here is what I suggest:
1. PRAY! I really believe that God will lead you to the right group of women. Be patient! It will take time.
2. START YOUR OWN GROUP. I have either started or been on the leadership team for each of the groups I have been involved in. Either at my home or church, I believe if you invite them, “they will come!”
3. GO TO A MOM HEART CONFERENCE! Sally Clarkson is a gifted speaker, writer and woman! I have learned so much from her! Going to her conferences have introduced me to like-minded women who have become my core group of friends. Surround yourself with those who spur you on to becoming a Godly woman. There is a conference coming up in either CA, TX or CO. http://momheartconference.com/register/
Do you have cheerleaders?
Do you have someone to pick you up?
Where do you turn for a shoulder to cry on?
Won’t you make it your goal for 2015 to find a community of women to BELONG?