I am a former tribal missionary to the Kuna Indians on the Colombian border in Central America. Fluent in several languages, my husband and I currently pastor a spanish-speaking church in Southern California. My passion is mentoring and equipping dedicated young women for life, marriage, motherhood and beyond. I am a mother of two daughters and the grandmother of three Princesses and four young Knights.
Do you consider yourself to be a wise person?
We each hold value systems that form our basic philosophies. These we purpose to pass on to our children through goals we set for them. Our desire is that they wisely hold our most highly valued principles. As caring moms, our goal should be nothing less than to produce wise children who are self-motivated to do good and hate evil.
Where do we begin?...
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of Wisdom and to fear the Lord is to hate evil.
I, Wisdom, hate pride, arrogance, evil behavior (rebellion) and perverse speech.”
Proverbs 1:7; Proverbs 8:13
What is a wise child? How would you recognize one?
Foolish children are easy to spot!
When Wisdom calls…LISTEN!
“Wisdom is seeing life’s situation from God’s point of view and acting in harmony with Him”. (ATIA) We will recognize wisdom in our child through his or her attitudes, words, and actions!
Knowing God and knowing our responsibility in life does not guarantee we will be successful in parenting! If we do not know how or what to do…we are lost. Most moms have teachable hearts that want to understand God’s instruction. Some even demonstrate a desire to honor God with a wise decision-making process regarding the manner of child development by adhering to God’s Word and voice when He calls!
Proverbs 29:17 says our “Children are to bring us REST
And to DELIGHT our souls!
Discipline your son or daughter and he will give you PEACE;
he will bring DELIGHT to your soul”.
Do your children bring delight to your soul?
Do they bring you peace and give you rest?
Wisdom is knowing the right path to take. Integrity is taking it!
We want wise children with integrity!
When our girls were not bringing us “rest” and “delighting our soul” we knew we were failing in our training. My life was not that much different than yours…lots of activity and responsibility and never enough time! We were convinced, as you are, that our success as parents would come from making our children successful.
When we take responsibility for our child’s behavior, we are in a position to change it! This is called Discipleship…the key to training. The goal of raising a wise child should be to develop godly Character.
“Godly character is developing right attitudes that produce right actions, habitually”. (RJ)
This involves the need for consistent “attitude training” which educates the spirit of a child, as well as the will. (Ask: Was it kind? Was it considerate?). It brings integrity back into focus by replacing the “action-response” teaching (“Mom said, don’t do that! Don’t touch! Stop it, I said don’t touch…no…no”)!
“Action-response” teaching has this sequence:
- Elevated tone of voice
- Threat added for emphasis
- No consequence with total resolve
This sequence cultivates REBELLION! God hates rebellion…
“For rebellion is like the sin of witchcraft…”! I Samuel 15: 23
Developing character in our little “Prince and Princesses” presupposes that WE are wise women of godly character! “We are known and read by our children all the time…” I Cor. 3:2. There is no hiding our true character…they read our spirit!
Do you know the test for measuring your own character??
Character is revealed by what we do in secret and
Maturity is revealed by what we do with our free time (T.V.; computer ;iPhone; iPad; books, magazines, music, FB, Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram, shopping, etc., etc..)
What do I do in secret? What do I do with my free time?
Abraham Lincoln said, “There is just one way to train a child in the way he should go and that is to travel that way yourself!”
We are an example, or an excuse!!
Children learn what we are first, through our attitudes; then, what we teach them. Training is first discipleship and then learning! Our job is to cause that learning in our child by lovingly training them to submit to our authority so they can be taught.
A child that is not under control of his/her authority is preoccupied with resisting that authority and he/she cannot receive teaching!
The child that resists authority IS the teacher!!
When the course of action you are using has the goal of developing godly character through attitude training, the child will mature with wisdom and balance and will understand purpose in his or her life.
What course of action are you on?